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Advice to Get You Started on Your Applications -- And, hopefully, Improve Your Whole Life :)

How to Write Your Stanford Short Answers and Short Essays, 2017-2018 - A Complete Guide

9/7/2017

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So you thought that the fact that "most schools are on the Common App" meant you'd basically be done after finishing your 650-word essay. And now you've realized... you were wrong. Stanford is your dream school, and it has one of the most comprehensive supplemental essay sections ever. 

Don't worry -- I've got you covered. 

In this post, I will walk you through each part of the Stanford Short Answer Essay Section.

If you haven't already, log on to your CommonApp.org account, select the "College Search" tab, and add Stanford to your "My Colleges" list. Now, click on "Stanford University" and select "Questions."

"General" and "Academics" don't require any additional writing; however, under "Activities," you will find your first additional essay prompt:
Briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences. (50-150 words)

As I wrote in a previous post, don't be boring.

​You've already filled out your main activities section, so the reader knows what extracurriculars you do. They know what awards you've won and what your role is in that community/group/team.

Don't reiterate that here.

Instead, use the space to talk about why you do this activity; how it has changed you; what about it you found the most meaningful

OR. Tell them what this activity says about your personality, goals or values.

OR. Think of something you want them to know about you that they don't know already.

Come up with at least three good ideas before choosing one. Here is how I would approach this essay:

Brainstorming -- without worrying about ideas being good, bad, cheesy, or cliche. When you're brainstorming, there are no bad ideas. 

Idea 1: Everything I Know About Life, I Learned From Basketball
Idea 2: "Flowers of Friendship Bloom Year-Round" - My year as a dorm proctor at my boarding school
Idea 3: I Am Not Afraid of Childbirth, Because Nothing Could Be More Painful Than Rowing - an essay about working hard to excel at a sport I love
​Idea 4: How One Game of Pickup Volleyball Changed My Life - when the varsity coach saw me playing, he invited me to try out for the team. Even though I'd planned on running cross country, I took a chance on something new, and loved it.


​

I like the first idea because my attitudes about life -- and how I confront sexism -- have been shaped by my participation in basketball, and I think I could write a memorable essay that would tell them something powerful about me.

The second idea is fun, because I truly believe I went above and beyond anything anyone could have expected of me as a proctor. There are the actual responsibilities I had... and the extra little things I did to make dorm life awesome. But there are probably several other dorm proctors applying this year who are also writing about being a proctor, and I'm not sure how unique my perspective will sound next to theirs. 

(Keep in mind: the same person who reads your essay is going to read all the other essays from your school -- and the schools near your school. So there's a pretty high probability of one reader seeing all of the "proctor" essays.)

The third idea is certainly memorable -- especially if I used the "childbirth" thing as a hook. I would also be writing about an extracurricular that few other high school students could, because most schools don't have a crew team.

Idea four touches on why I switched from cross country to volleyball (I asked myself, "What else can I do? How else can I play to my strengths?") and broke every front row record (including a few career records) my first season. This is an impressive accomplishment... but potentially hard to write about without being too braggy. (Plus, I will probably have mentioned breaking all those records in my Activities section.) 

​So let's say I settled on basketball. Here's how my first essay would look:
Briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences. (50-150 words)​

Everything I know about life, I learned from pickup basketball.

I learned that the most important goal… is to get in the game. The only way to improve is through experience. So figure out how to get in (free throws? Threes?), and master that skill -- even if you never do it during the game. 

The second most important objective… is to win the mental game. Anyone who knows me would say I’m among the sweetest people they’ve met. But the first thing I do when I play ball is convince the guy (or girl) I’m guarding that I'm about to humiliate them. It’s all about posture, confidence, and starting explosively. The first five seconds can determine the whole game.

Third, fundamentals. Master them. Practice them every day.

Finally, if you don’t do it 100%, there’s no point doing it at all.

​I like this essay because, although thousands of students play basketball, this essay says a lot about my personality. It shows that I am powerful, strategic and aggressive.

But... there's a chance a reader might take issue with my tone. So perhaps I could try a softer route, depending on what kind of feedback I got from friends or college counselors. 
Briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences. (50-150 words)​

You already know that I’ve made impressive accomplishments on the volleyball court; what you don’t know is that it all started with a single game of pickup volleyball.
​
My sophomore spring, I was set on continuing with cross country the next fall. I loved my teammates, the woody New England race courses, and, mostly, my amazing coach. But when the varsity volleyball coach happened upon me smashing the ball down in my best friend’s face (he thought since he was five inches taller than me, he could block my hits), he invited me to try-outs.

After careful consideration, I said yes!

Volleyball taught me to accept and seek opportunities. It taught me to always ask myself, “What else can I do?” Finally, it taught me that starting behind doesn’t mean you’ll never get ahead. Among my achievements is breaking three career records, even though I only played for two years.

This might be more palatable to the reader. But either way, aren't both of these essays way more interesting than your standard, boring, interchangeable:
1. Briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences. (50-150 words)​


I have always been passionate about sports, but my favorite has always been basketball. This year, I am the captain of the team, meaning I am responsible for organizing team bonding events, fundraisers, and, of course, ordering team gear. 

Through basketball, I have formed friendships with amazing coaches and teammates, improved my health and fitness, and had a lot of fun! It has also taught me lessons about leadership, which will be valuable to me as I pursue a career in business.

There's no​ comparison, right?
Don't be boring! Contact Paved With Verbs today!

Under "Activities"​ is "Contacts," which doesn't require any writing (unless this is your second time applying to Stanford), then "Family," which also requires no writing. 

The next tab is "Short Questions," which obviously requires additional writing. Let's go over it. 
What is the most significant challenge that society faces today? (50 word limit)

​There is obviously no correct answer to this question. If you have a social/scientific/political cause, this would be a great place to address that. If there is a theme you want them to see on your application, this is a great place to explicitly state it. (For example, "Global warming. I never imagined when I took AP Environmental Science that the course would awaken a lifelong cause. Beyond XYZ community service work, I've also developed my interest by taking the Marine Biology, Climate Change and History of Propaganda electives.").

Or, again (this is something you should ask yourself as you answer all of these questions): if there is something impressive or unique you want them to know about you that they don't, you can find a creative way to write about that. 


Here's my brainstorm:

Idea 1: Free speech on college campus. I'm about to start college, and there are people fighting to censor art, lectures and discussions on campus. This scares me, as it directly affects my education and that of the nation's brightest youth. But it also hinders the quest for truth. No scholar should ever be scared to ask a question.
Idea 2: Threats to the environment. I'm a big scuba diver, and in my lifetime, I've watched the color drained from the coral reefs. Ecologies are changing due to overfishing, climate change, etc. This is a huge emotional tragedy, because I love the underwater world. But it's also a serious global issue, and I've taken coursework and attended seminars and camps to support this interest.
Idea 3: Evil. The scary thing about evil is that psychology studies indicate that most "evil" people aren't evil -- they're just normal people in bad situations Making evil the hardest thing to fight against and eliminate. 
Idea 4: Trump. And the fact that people follow him. Don't shy away from expressing a political opinion if you can support your ideas with not just experience, but also rational thought and evidence.
Idea 5: The internet. It has opened doors, but has also created extremism -- religiously, and otherwise. And, in a democratic society that believes in free speech and other liberal values... what can we really do to fight it?

The essay about evil might be a great choice for someone interested in the social sciences, or who has taken AP Psychology. The environment would be a good one, because it ties in with my previously-expressed interests in biology, chemistry and scuba diving. Plus, objectively, climate change probably is the biggest issue facing humanity right now. 

Free speech and Trump are great topics, but might be too controversial for a college essay. Unless they are highly relevant to activities and pursuits you've mentioned on the application -- or unless you're super passionate about either topic -- it might be better to run with one of the other ideas.

Maybe The Internet, since it's thoughtful and unexpected. For example:
What is the most significant challenge that society faces today? (50 word limit)

Anti-vaxxers. Fake news. Election tampering. Religious and political extremists. They’re all powered by the internet.

The internet isn’t inherently bad -- it’s opened opportunities around the world. But it’s also allowed hateful and/or misguided individuals who previously existed on the fringe of society… reach a vibrant global audience.
​
Need more help developing your ideas? Click here!

Next prompt:​​
How did you spend your last two summers? (50 word limit)

​​Okay. This one's pretty easy. Just answer the question. If you did several things over the summer, you might pick a few that were the most important or meaningful to you, rather than bombard them with a long list. Consider this:
​How did you spend your last two summers? (50 word limit)

Studying, sailing and scuba diving in the Caribbean. It was luxurious… but not. We cleaned our own toilets, scrubbed algae off the boats, and exclusively ate carbs. In AP Biology, I'd discovered the complexity of human physiology. In Rescue Diver training, I discovered how obediently our bodies follow the laws of physics.

​Vs. this:
​How did you spend your last two summers? (50 word limit)

​In 2016, I visited Alaska with my family for a week. Next, I trained for cross country and took care of our farm. Finally, I spent three weeks at ActionQuest, a scuba diving camp.

In 2017, I spent most of the summer in Ithaca, NY. In August, I returned to ActionQuest to continue my dive training.

Remember: colleges don't just care about what​. They also care about why.
Let's talk about what you did last summer - and the best way to write about it!

Next essay:
What historical moment or event do you wish you could have witnessed? (50 word limit)

This is a slightly harder one -- which historical moment don't I wish I could have witnessed?

If you have one you totally, sincerely want to write about, go for it! There are no wrong answers. The admissions officers just want to get to know you. But if you're stuck...


1. Try to think of a historical event that would tell the admissions something about you. OR.
2. Be a little outside the box. Pick a historical event that you not only want to witness -- but also CHANGE. Include your "why" and "how."
3. Think of something cool about yourself you want them to know. How can you tie that into this essay?


So, for my brainstorm:

Idea 1: I studied four years of Latin and a year of ancient Greek (and had won some awards in the National Latin/Greek Competition), so it would make sense for me to write about an event related to my interest in that. 
Idea 2: The filming of Back to the Future. Robert Zemeckis and Bob Gale are creative geniuses, and I would have loved to witness their creative process, first-hand. 
Idea 3: The founding of Phillips Exeter Academy. I love that school an unreasonable amount, and this could be a chance to talk more about my decision to leave my home (a farm, which I loved) to go to a boarding school a thousand miles away.
Idea 4: Hitler's art class. Young Hitler failed his art class... but maybe if I'd been there, I could have encouraged him to pursue his passion -- and helped humanity avoid one of its darkest hours. 


I liked the first and last of these ideas best. The first would illustrate my interest in the classics, and the second would show my love of psychology. So I could go with something like:
What historical moment or event do you wish you could have witnessed? (50 word limit)

​Hitler’s art class.


After a broody adolescence, young Hitler found his passion: art. Sadly, he failed his art class, and eventually became a monster. If I could enroll in that class, I’d help him pursue his dream, no matter what the teacher said. This could prevent humanity’s darkest hour.

Or, perhaps:
What historical moment or event do you wish you could have witnessed? (50 word limit)

The Trojan War.

After four years of Latin and Greek, I’m ready to uncover the mystery, pitting history vs. mythology. There’s archeological evidence of a kingdom in Turkey that was destroyed around 1180 BC. Is this what inspired Homer, Herodotus, Sophocles, and Virgil (whom I’ve read in their original tongue)?
​

​Or, say I didn't take Latin and Greek, but I did take film studies classes, and/or want to study film in college:
What historical moment or event do you wish you could have witnessed? (50 word limit)
​
The filming of Back to the Future. I’d love to witness
Robert Zemeckis’ and Bob Gale’s creative genius and decision making process. Having read two books and written an Exeter Art Review feature about BTTF, I’d arrive armed with a list of questions.


And, ironically, in a time machine.
​

Each of these essays says something different about me -- and your essay should certainly say something about you.
Need help brainstorming? Contact me!

​The next question is:
What five words best describe you?

First thing to know: you can enter up to TEN words in this box.

Second, this prompt can be as easy or as hard as you want it to be. Try to have fun with it -- but keep in mind that being creative and memorable in this little space is tricky, and requires thought and effort on your part.

The good news is, I can easily reuse some of my ideas from 
How to Write Your USC Short Answers to write this "mini-essay":

On the USC application, I brainstormed:


Strong. Sincere. Silly. :P
Strong. Sincere. Silly! (Bonus points for alliteration?)
Intelligent. Athletic. Competitive. (Seriously - bring it on!)
Creative. Curiosophile. Neologistic.
Grit. Purpose. Passion.
Fun-loving. Creative. Indecisive. No -- wait...

Literally? Second-person. Singular. Objective. Pronoun. 


Since they're asking for five words (USC only wanted three), and you can enter up to ten, I would probably use some combination of these ideas -- why not? I've already put in the work!

However, I would not put more than five words to describe myself -- do what the prompt says, and use the surplus space if and only if you can say something thoughtful/clever/cute about the five words you chose. 

So, perhaps:​
What five words best describe you?

​Curiosophile. Neologistic. Compassionate. Playful. Competitive (seriously -- bring it on!). ​


I like this answer because pairing "curiosophile" with "neologistic" is creative and intelligent and silly -- so instead of choosing one of those words to say what I am, I show all three with these odd word choices. (Not to mention the fact that probably more than 80% of applicants will call themselves "creative" and/or "intelligent." Much better to show it, somehow.)

(For those who don't get it, neologism means "new word." "Neologistic" may, itself, be a new word --  as is "curiosophile," a word I made up that means "one who loves curiosity." People with a love of English -- people whose job it is to read essays all day -- will understand and appreciate this.)

I chose compassionate, because that is pretty accurate for me -- I showed that in a previous answer by wanting help, rather than murder, young Hitler. Plus, it kind of softens the whole powerful-and-competitive-female-athlete thing a little. Admissions officers want to build a community, and I want to make sure they know I am also a nice person. ​

But! Since I'm a language person, I also like the "second-person pronoun" idea. It's cute. It says a little bit about me -- but arguably not as much as it could, had I used the space to describe myself.

Or! You can go with words that may be specific to your interests. For example: 
What five words best describe you?

Summertime: Sore wrist (#pipetting), bruised ego (#sciencefails)
Schoolyear: BUSY (#lovinglife)


What Five Words Best Describe You? Let's Find Out!
Great! So now... we're not almost done. But we're closer.

Next prompt:​
When the choice is yours, what do you read, listen to, or watch? (50 word limit)

This is another "new" prompt. Last year, the question asked about some of your favorite books, websites, etc. I'm guessing what happened is that EVERYONE said Gatsby or Catcher in the Rye, so they went ahead and specified: we're not talking about books  you were assigned in AP English.

​The best approach to this... is honest, with a spin.

Tell them who you really are. But make sure you do it in a way that's interesting. Don't send a 50-word list of books and movies. That's boring. Instead, do something like this:
When the choice is yours, what do you read, listen to, or watch? (50 word limit)

The New York Times - It’s easy for boarding school students to forget there’s an outside world. This keeps me grounded.

The Exonian - It's is a great way to find out the speakers, forums and events happening all over campus. Plus, I often grace the pages of the sports section.

Or possibly:
When the choice is yours, what do you read, listen to, or watch? (50 word limit)

I read The New York Times over breakfast -- and I unexpectedly stumbled upon a photo of myself one morning! Living in New Hampshire, I tried to meet everyone who ran in the 2016 primaries. A photographer snapped a photo of me with Marco Rubio... and now I’m a stock image.

This one tells a bit about me (that I actively seek opportunities in my community), and it tells a story (I became a stock image!), and it shows that I don't just read -- I also do.

Both of these versions show that I actively seek out opportunities in a world full of opportunities (in other words, I'm not going to be a "waste of space" on their campus). However, it's possible that the reader could confuse my eagerness to hear from all the presidential candidates with name-dropping. So I'd ask for a second opinion before submitting.

Okay, but say you're not really into newspapers. 

As I already said, 80% of applicants are going to do the totally boring thing and put a list of books, authors, films and artists they like.

Be a part of the other 20%. Instead of cramming in as many works as possible, focus on 1-3 that have especially affected you -- and then tell them why. And, again -- think about what makes you a unique candidate, and try to pick books, authors, etc. that show that quality/trait about you.

​Here's my brainstorm:

Sondheim -- great composer and lyricist. Compliments my interest in music, and ties in with my extracurriculars (acting and playwriting).
​Crosby, Stills and Nash -- most people don't have a favorite song. I do. It's "Suite: Judy Blue Eyes." Plus, I saw them in concert once, and it was amazing. (And it ties in with my interest in guitar.)
Spice Girls -- say what you will about them, but I think they're a legitimate pop band. Ginger Spice is the first person who introduced me to the word "feminism" and "girl power."
Catch-22 -- probably the best book of all time. It will make you question everything. 
The Encyclopedia of Recreational Diving -- because how many girls who grew up in the landlocked state of Iowa became obsessed with scuba diving -- and read an entire encyclopedia about it, cover-to-cover? 


I have a pretty good reason to write about any of these topics... So here are three sample essays:
​When the choice is yours, what do you read, listen to, or watch? (50 word limit)​

Encyclopedia of Recreational Diving. Despite growing up on a sheep farm in the landlocked state of Iowa, I became obsessed with scuba diving. After two summers at ActionQuest, I completed my Rescue Diver, Underwater Navigator, Underwater Naturalist and Search and Recovery training. This fall, I read the entire encyclopedia, cover-to-cover.
​

When the choice is yours, what do you read, listen to, or watch? (50 word limit)
​
​
Catch-22. I reread it every year. You know when a whole chapter crescendos to some grand point, and the last line knocks the wind out of you? That’s every paragraph of Catch-22.

"You're inches from death every time you fly a mission. How much older can you be at your age?”

​
When the choice is yours, what do you read, listen to, or watch? (50 word limit)
​

Sondheim
. First, he writes the best alliterations. My personal favorite: "We've no time to sit and dither / While her withers wither with her."


Second, he taught me that lyrics aren’t just words. Case in point: "Maria! I've just met a girl named Maria." 

Now, if only I could stop bombing my auditions and be in a musical someday.



Another thought on this essay: why limit yourself to recordings and print? Think about live performances, concerts, lectures, classes, etc., that you've attended in person. 

​During high school, I saw:

- Dozens of assemblies at school, some of which I still remember.
- Dozens of political speeches during the Iowa caucuses and the New Hampshire primaries
- Cats Off-Broadway in Boston
​- Several student rock shows (some of which I was also in)
- Crosby, Stills and Nash in concert
- Lynard Skynard in concert
- Bob Dylan and Willie Nelson in concert

I wish I could write about all of them! But I only have 50 words, so...
​What were your favorite events (e.g., performances, exhibits, competitions, conferences, etc.) in recent years? (50 word limit)

Student rock shows. They inspired me to learn guitar and start my own band, Two-and-a-Half. Our rendition of Mulan's “Be a Man” earned us a standing ovation last spring!

Paul Hawkin’s assembly, “Natural Capitalism: The Next Industrial Revolution,” based on his book of the same title. Talk about innovation!

This is fun, because it shows that a mandatory part of my school day, assembly, is something I enjoy and take meaning from. It also shows that my peers inspired me to take action -- that's always a good thing.

Next essay:
Name one thing you are looking forward to experiencing at Stanford. (50 word limit)

There are more things to experience at Stanford than you could possible ever experience. How exciting is that? 

The point of this essay is to make sure you have a good reason for applying to Stanford. Not because it's a "top school" or "your dream school." But because Stanford has something only Stanford has, and you want to experience it.

Some things that, to me, make Stanford unique:

1. There is no university where collaboration is easier. Stanford has one campus, and doctors work alongside computer scientists and electrical engineers and lawyers and ethicists. 
2. Stanford guarantees on-campus housing to undergraduates for all four years. Stanford Housing offers an unparalleled residential experience. Most campuses guarantee one year of housing, or they guarantee four years, but most students live off-campus. At Stanford, almost everyone lives side-by-side, creating magical, impromptu experiences and helping you become more completely immersed in campus life. 
3. Stanford athletics. Despite having the top athletic program in the country for the past twenty or so years... Stanford athletes are top-notch students. They won't recruit you unless you are academically as competitive as other successful applicants... and this is something that is hard to find at other schools with top athletic programs. (Also, fun fact: if Stanford were a country, its gold medals in the 2016 Olympics would be tied for the seventh-best country in the world, only behind: the US (37), Great Britain (24), China (22), Germany (14), Russia (13), and Japan (12).)
4. Every department is one of the best (at least top 10), if not the best in the world, which no other school can claim. It was recently selected as the top school for the study of the humanities AND engineering. Therefore, there is a strong argument to be made that Stanford has the best overall academics of any school in the world.
5. Money. Stanford has so much money. That's why they have millions of dollars to spend every year on making sure undergrads have fun things to do every weekend; travel grants for undergraduate researchers to present their work at conferences; overseas studies and seminars; service grants and fellowships for those who want to make a difference at home or abroad; and pretty much every opportunity you can and can't think of.
6. Birthplace of the Silicon Valley. Without Stanford, there would be no Silicon Valley. (But Silicon Valley helped build Stanford up to its current wealth and prestige, so it's definitely a symbiotic relationship.)

And so on. Stanford is incredible. But the opportunity you should write about here is one that is important to you​. Give it some thought, and make sure to do your research. 

​Next question: 

Imagine you had an extra hour in the day — how would you spend that time? (50 word limit).

OMG. Super cool prompt, right? What would you do?

This is the last Short Answer, so think carefully about what you haven't said on this application that you couldn't -- either because there wasn't room on the app, or because there wasn't room in your life. Think about how this answer could tie into your theme or goals, and come up with several ideas -- both realistic and fantastical -- before you start writing.

Here's my brainstorm:

Idea 1: I love musicals. SO much. And I try our for them every semester, but I never get a part. If I had an extra hour, I'd learn how to sing, dance, and, importantly, audition better. It wouldn't change the world... but it would change my world.
Idea 2: I love writing music. It's a hobby, not a dream. When I tell people I'm into songwriting, they always ask if they can listen to my stuff online. They can't, because I don't have enough time to record my music. That could be a good thing to do with my extra hour! 
Idea 3: I built my first Arduino project recently. If I had an extra hour, I would spend it coding and hardware-ing, not just because I think it's important to understand engineering -- but also because it's fun!
Idea 4: I studied Latin and Greek in high school, and I loved it so, so much. But... I would also love to be able to speak a language. If I had an extra hour, I'd spend it learning Spanish.
Idea 5:
 Everything I do, I'd be better at if I were more flexible. I'd be stronger. I could rock climb better. I could jump higher in volleyball and basketball. I'd reduce my risk of injury by so much. It might be worth spending the extra hour doing yoga. Honestly, I've done it before, and I kind of like it, and it's kind of boring, so once I got the routine down, I might start listening to audiobooks to kill two birds with one stone.
Idea 6: I'd learn how to fix things. I'm this super smart, Stanford-bound girl... but if my toilet broke, I wouldn't know what to do. If my bike broke, I'd be stuck. In addition to being book smart, I would want to develop some important life skills that my generation has supposedly lost. 
Idea 7: Sleeping. I've done a great job of taking advantage of opportunities and building the life I want. The only thing missing... is 8 hours of sleep per night. That extra hour would make me better at what I do, and it would make what I do feel better. 


Any of these would make an authentic and fun 50-word essay. So from here, I would go over my other essays and ask myself, how much does this complement what I've already said? Am I repeating myself. I've already written about sports... would it be overkill to write about them again?

Here are some samples:
Imagine you had an extra hour in the day — how would you spend that time? (50 word limit).

​They say my generation can’t handle rejection. But, believe me -- I can.

Every quarter, I try out for plays and musicals. So far, all I’ve ever been is a no-name chorus girl.

That’s why I’d spend my hour learning how to audition. Bonus: these skills would ultimately help with job interviews.


Imagine you had an extra hour in the day — how would you spend that time? (50 word limit).

Honestly? Sleeping.

I’ve spent four years organizing events, running teams, making friends, and building the life I want. The only thing missing… is eight hours of sleep.

That extra hour of sleep would make me better at everything I do, and it would make everything I do feel better.


Imagine you had an extra hour in the day — how would you spend that time? (50 word limit).

“I love burritos so much! I just wrote a song about them!” I gush in line at the dining hall.

“Really? Can I listen online?” asks Shuo.

I love songwriting. But, alas! I never have time to record my music. With a twenty-fifth hour each day, that’s the first thing I’d do.
​
Spend your extra hour working with Paved With Verbs!

Great! Now we're done with the Short Answers. On to the Short Essays! 
  1. The Stanford community is deeply curious and driven to learn in and out of the classroom. Reflect on an idea or experience that makes you genuinely excited about learning.
The old essay prompt was very similar: ​Stanford students possess an intellectual vitality. Reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your intellectual development. (250 word limit). I think they've updated the wording because most students had no idea what was meant by "intellectual vitality."

So this year, they clarified. 

​"Intellectual vitality" is deep curiosity -- a drive to learn in AND BEYOND (that's important) the classroom. Stanford is a place where you'll have Genius Grant winners and Nobel Laureates teaching your introductory-level classes. That's a huge opportunity, and they want to MAKE SURE you will take advantage of it. 

How do you convince them of that?

Well, you've already filled out your activities and short answers, so the reader knows what extracurriculars you do -- and possibly what awards you've won and what your role is in your various groups/teams/communities.

Don't reiterate that here.

This is a space to talk about 
why you do what you do; how it has changed you; what about it you found the most meaningful

OR. Tell them something you cool about you that they don't know already. 

Come up with at least three good ideas before choosing one. Here's my brainstorm:

Idea 1: Everything I Learned About Life, I Learned From Basketball.
Idea 2: Why I Loved Growing Up On a Farm, And How It's Shaped My Intellectual Development
Idea 3: How a Girl From Iowa Fell In Love With Scuba Diving and Became a Rescue Diver and DAN Oxygen Administrator.
Idea 4: The Power of the Mind - My Independent Reading on the Placebo Effect, and What It Means for Human Health

​

I think my interest in biology and life sciences is probably more interesting (intellectually) than my experiences playing basketball, so I wrote about basketball in the Short Answers section. Here, I'm going to write about growing up on a farm -- in a way that (hopefully) only I can.
  1. The Stanford community is deeply curious and driven to learn in and out of the classroom. Reflect on an idea or experience that makes you genuinely excited about learning.


​By the time I was six, I’d seen almost every animal on my farm having sex.

I’d observed that dogs get “stuck together” after intercourse. I’d observed that kitty cats experience pain, because the tom has a barbed penis. And I’d observed that it’s easy to distinguish male ducks from females -- due to the nonconsensual nature of duck reproduction, females rarely had feathers on the backs on their necks.

I’d also learned that life can be ugly. Ewes can’t count; when delivering twins or triplets, they might accidentally leave a newborn in the snow to die. Horses founder -- sometimes, your only option is euthanasia. Mother cats hide their newborn kittens, because tomcats murder them otherwise.

As I grew, I discovered agriculture. I spent my summers detasseling corn -- that is, ripping the male reproductive organs off of corn plants and throwing them on the ground. (This prevents corn from self-pollinating, therefore producing a hybrid vigor.) Corn leaves are sharp, so I wore long sleeves and pants in the humid Iowa heat. I walked miles each day, brushing worms and spiders off of my face as I vasectomized. 

These early learning experiences continue to affect me, in and out of the classroom. Beyond informing my class schedule and electives... it also sparked an interest in scuba diving and ecology. Today, I'm a certified Underwater Naturalist, and I look forward to continuing to explore the world of life in the classroom and the field.
​
Hopkins Marine Station, here I come! 

Okay, so, look. This essay is edgy. It's about sex. It says "penises" in it. And this is how it reads after edits to remove more controversial terms.

But... it's hard to stand out if you're not willing to take a risk.

Besides, the people reading this are presumably adults. Whether your intellectual vitality is sex or poop or boogers (and I've seen essays on all these topics), they should be able to approach it with an open mind.

After all, the purpose of a university is to find truth, and you can't do that through minced words and censorship, right? 

But beyond being memorable, this essay is also an extremely personal look into my life. Life on the farm is hard. I wouldn't trade it for anything, but it was hard. 

And! It mentions something that is very special and unique to Stanford: the Hopkins Marine Station, located two hours south of Stanford in Monterey, CA, where undergraduates can study "abroad" for a quarter, and/or spend half a quarter before participating in Stanford at Sea, a 6-week sailing and research program.
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Cool, right?

But, okay. Maybe you wrote an essay like that, and people are telling you it's too edgy. You've got to do what's in your heart, but it's always good to carefully consider people's feedback.

If you decide you want to go with something safer, you can still be interesting. Even if you don't know exactly what you want to do "when you grow up." Consider this:
  1. 1. The Stanford community is deeply curious and driven to learn in and out of the classroom. Reflect on an idea or experience that makes you genuinely excited about learning.


“Eva, wake up!”

Moments earlier, I’d been sleeping peacefully, my hammock swaying gently between the mast and the forestay. Now -- 

“My dive buddy is missing! I last saw him… somewhere over there. You have to save him!”

My eyes widened at the seriousness of the situation.

Then Fresca, my dive instructor, gave a sly smile and started her stopwatch.

It’s the middle of the night! I thought, hopping into action. I’ll never complain about a pop quiz in school again!

Hurrying around the deck, I assembled gear and tracked down dive lights while forming a rescue plan. What would be the best search pattern? How should I direct my team in complete silence and darkness?

Oddly, this midnight adventure all started on a small sheep farm in Iowa. Having spent my childhood witnessing the miracles (births, recovery, and development) and misfortunes (stillborns, disease, and death) of life, I’d developed an early interest in biology, which evolved into a love of ecology, which flowed into an Underwater Naturalist certification. The next step in my scuba training was to become a Rescue Diver -- which mutated into another intellectual interest.

Between my Oxygen Administrator classes, Search and Recovery training, and the most important lesson I ever learned as a Rescue Diver -- recognize and quell panic before it becomes an emergency -- I realized that, while I love biology, my passion is leadership. Whether that means running my own genetics lab or managing a team at 23andMe someday is uncertain.

But what I do know… is that from now on, I'm sleeping next to my fully-assembled dive kit. ​

It's cute, right? 

I got rid of the edginess, but still made it adventurous. It's still memorable, and it's a fun way to connect some of the dots in my story.​
What's the best way to connect YOUR dots? Let's talk about it.

​The next question is: 
2. Virtually all of Stanford's undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate -- and us -- know you better. (250 word limit)

​Personally, I don't love this prompt. But Stanford clearly does -- this question was on the application ten year ago, when I applied... and it's still there, now. 

Shockingly, some applicants don't put much effort this question. (Maybe that's why I think it's such a bummer.) And then they get rejected.

If you don't 
really tell the essay reader something memorable, interesting or impressive about yourself, you won't get in. And, sure. You've already said so many things about yourself. What's even left?

Well, one thing is your personality. 
There is potential here to inject your personality into this application. It's a letter, so you can be as formal or informal as you want with your writing. 

Need help coming up with some memorable details? Ask yourself the following questions (inspired by the 
UNC Short Answer questions):

  • What five words would you use to describe yourself? You will already have answered this in your short-answer section, so don't be repetitive and say them again here. Instead, think of ways you can illustrate those traits. If you chose "curious," write about how you're always late for class -- because you always have so many crazy hypothetical questions to ask your teachers after your previous class. If you chose "funny," tell a joke. If you chose studious, say that they will basically be living in a single room, because you expect to spend most of your time in a biology research lab or the library.
  • What are your personality quirks?
  • What's something about you that people find surprising?
  • What's your "biggest little worry"?
  • What is the most fun you've ever had?
  • What is your most outrageous travel story?
  • Have you ever had roommates before -- siblings or otherwise? What did you learn?

After answering those questions, you should have a few good ideas or this essay. The next questions you can ask yourself are:
  • What are our goals for college -- or even just freshman year?
  • What are your goals for your senior year of high school?
  • What resources and opportunities do you hope to take advantage of at Stanford?

Digging into some of these topics is WAY more interesting than the "logistics" trap many students get stuck in. DON'T tell me whether you keep the room messy or clean. DON'T waste 12 of your precious, precious words saying, "My name is ____, and I can't wait to meet you next fall."

Absolutely everyone else does that. It says nothing, and it makes you sound boring.

INSTEAD. Show admissions officers that you've done your research. You're not applying to Stanford because it's a "good school." You're applying because you know what Stanford has to offer, and you're excited to get your hands dirty.
Virtually all of Stanford's undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate -- and us -- know you better. (250 word limit)​

Dear Roommate,

I apologize in advance if I don’t shake your hand when we (finally) meet -- I’m an avid rower, and often have oozing, open blisters covering my hands. That said, if you hear me yelping in the shower, don’t be alarmed! That’s just what happens when I get shampoo in my wounds.

When I’m not rowing, you’ll find me playing guitar, writing completely non-pretentious originals (don't miss my latest, "Respect the Call" on Youtube: goo.gl/EvaSong), or tossing a frisbee. I love nothing more than “skying” people who are bigger than me -- if it's easy, what's the point, right?

Have you picked a major? I definitely haven’t. I love biology, but am excited to explore psychology, political science and product design courses. I do know that I’m stoked about IntroSems -- I’m torn between The Ocean Around Us, an oceanography class that provides fieldwork opportunities, and Inside the Jet Engine, which apparently includes a trip to the Boeing factory in Arizona (!!!????).  

Also! I've enclosed a copy of The Righteous Mind: Why Good People Are Divided by Religion and Politics. It's one of my favorite books ever -- and, in my opinion, one of the most important books a student can possibly read before starting college. I hope you'll read it so we can discuss! If not, please pass it on to someone who'll love it -- or at least love debating it!

See you soon -- or, as we say in Latin, "Die dulci fruere!"

Eva
​
Dear Future Stanford Applicant, How can I help you with your essays?

See how that was WAY more interesting than talking about microwaves and bed sheets?

Moreover, I like this essay because it sounds like me. That's how I talk. That's the way I joke. Don't make the ever-so-common mistake of treating your college applications like a scholarly essay. Contractions are fine. Colloquial language is fine. You are not writing for a professor or a research journal. You are writing for someone who wants to get to know you -- especially in your letter to your roommate. 

Plus, it shows my creativity (writing songs) and curiosity (taking a class about jet engines, even though I'm not majoring in engineering), while emphasizing an extracurricular that I have indicated I plan to continue in college (and have, in fact, been in touch with the crew coach about). I also touch briefly on collaboration, which, as I wrote in If You Want to be Pre-Med, READ THIS, is the future of education. 

Next (and, at last, final!) essay:

  1. 3. Tell us about something that is meaningful to you, and why?
This is another new-ish one. The old prompt was, "What matters to you, and why?" 

​I guess this wasn't specific enough... or the answers students were writing weren't... meaningful enough. Because now Stanford has clarified. 

​Another super open prompt. You can go wherever you want with this. And probably, the more creative and outside the box you can be, the better. 

Be as colloquial as you want.
Interpret this question however you want.
Try to make sure your essay topic ties into the overall theme of your application in a meaningful way. 
If there's something you want them to know about you that they don't yet, say that here.

As always, start by brainstorming at least five ideas before picking one. Here are mine:

- Riding my bike to the beach with my friends. I work hard in sports and in school, but my friends, and my sense of adventure, are still really important to me. 
- Small farmers. It's hard to make ends meet as a small farmer, and this matters to me because my father and grandfather were both farmers. 
- High school. I LOVE(d) high school, but I feel like a lot of students don't. It is important to me that people have positive experiences in high school, so they can look back on this time of their life fondly, and come out of school with more confidence and happiness.
- The environment, for obvious reasons.


The fact that I care about the environment "for obvious reasons" probably means that it's not a fresh topic to write about -- especially considering I can share firsthand stories about small farmers if I write about that. However, I have written an essay about growing up on a farm, and there's no need to rehash that. The topic that feels the most "me" -- and the topic that I actually did write one of my Stanford essays about, ten years ago -- and the topic that ended up being the topic of​ my Stanford master's thesis -- and the topic I went on to start a blog about -- is playfulness. So that's probably the topic I would write my final supplemental essay about.
Tell us about something that is meaningful to you, and why? (100 to 250 words)

“CLOSE THE WINDOW!”

A gust of Atlantic wind whips the corner of the “house” out of my hand, exposing us to the harsh elements of Hampton Beach. Are those icicles forming in my hair?

Probably.

I grab my corner of the towel and tuck it into the driftwood, completing the “roof” of our little shelter. In lieu of a fireplace, we cram our wet, half-naked bodies as close together as possible, shivering until we laugh hysterically.

It’s Principal’s Day, an Exeter tradition in which one day of class is unexpectedly canceled. Many Exonians stayed home today, “catching up on work” or “relaxing.” But my favorite thing about myself is my playfulness, my sense of adventure.

So I braved the cold temperatures, rallied the troops, bought a lot of duct tape (that’s totally how you fix the broken bikes you bought last week at a rummage sale, right?) and hit the road at 5am in order to make a sunrise penguin plunge.

To write an essay about playfulness may be to imply that I am not a “serious” student. But quite the contrary: my passion for play makes me productive (through play, I learned never to set a Monday deadline). It keeps me curious and inspires ideas for projects, op-eds and miscellaneous undertakings. It keeps my feet dirty and my elbows skinned and my lungs gasping for air. It’s the most important part of me…

And probably the part of me that is most likely to change the world.

I like this essay because it is nostalgic and fun. It's light and playful -- a lot of these essays are probably going to end up being about social injustice, immigration and eating disorders, so I think a day at the beach is a nice change.

I like the way it looks. When you write long paragraphs, it makes your essay look daunting, and reading it becomes less enjoyable. I like the narrative and what it says about me. It shows my pro-social tendencies, and my tenacity. 

I doubt someone who read this essay ten years ago would ever have guessed that I would end up being a "world play expert." But it continues to astonish me, to this day, that something that was important to me then became my life. I wonder how often that happens in these applications.

Probably more often than you'd think.

***


Rereading these essays, I feel proud. I feel joy. I feel like I've written an authentic set of essays that paint an accurate picture of me. When you're done with your​ essays, that's how you should feel, too. (Obviously, this is something I can help you with, being a college counselor and all.)
​
If you'd like to ask me additional questions about your application, fill out the Contact Form, below. ​

    Contact Paved With Verbs College Counseling and Life Coaching.

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5 Comments
helpedorange
11/20/2017 11:08:51 am

Your articles are amazing! Thank you for putting the time into these for prospective applicants; I believe they're helping many. Btw, do you have any advise on how to make the essays more sensory and immersive, and maintain transition para to para?
Have a great day.

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Vintage Basketball Shirt link
10/22/2023 02:50:11 pm

This is a great insight into how to approach a challenging essay prompt like the one Stanford has. Your perspective on the common pitfalls and the importance of standing out by sharing unique and memorable aspects of oneself is spot on.

I appreciate the way you encourage applicants to think about their personalities, quirks, and experiences that set them apart. Your advice to avoid the "logistics" trap and show enthusiasm for Stanford's specific opportunities is invaluable. It's clear that you want to help students make the most of this opportunity to showcase their personality and motivations effectively.

Your suggested questions are a helpful guide for students to brainstorm and generate ideas. Overall, a thoughtful and practical take on a seemingly daunting essay prompt, making it easier for applicants to inject their individuality and enthusiasm into their application.

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Lorena M link
11/21/2023 12:47:05 am

I appreciate you sharing this

Reply
ThankYou
12/29/2024 05:53:25 pm

Very helpful blog post!

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    Eva Glasrud completed her B.A. and M.A. at Stanford. She is now a college counselor and life coach for gifted youth.

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