Paved With Verbs
​
​College Admissions Counseling
***
Life Coaching
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
  • Oxford-Style Tutorials
  • Contact
  • Blog
  • Life Coaching
  • Payments

Blog
Advice to Get You Started on Your Applications -- And, hopefully, Improve Your Whole Life :)

How to Write Your University of Michigan Supplemental Essays

10/28/2016

8 Comments

 
Picture
Whether you're interested in business, engineering, or something completely different, the University of Michigan is an excellent place to begin the next step of your education. 

However, because UMich attracts so many qualified candidates, they don't make it easy to apply! In addition to your Common Application essay, you need to write three supplemental essays. 

I've worked with dozens of students on their U-M applications, so I know what mistakes and cliches to avoid. Use the tips in this post to write unforgettable supplementals that are uniquely you.
If you could only do one of the activities you have listed in the Activities section of your Common Application, which one would you keep doing? Why? (Required for all applicants. Approximately 100 words)

They say approximately 100 words. But this essay can be up to 150 words long. Something to keep in mind. 

This is a reasonably straightforward question. What's your favorite extracurricular? Why?

However, I often recommend taking a not-straightforward approach, because 90% of these essays begin with something boring, like:

"I have been passionate about Activity for four years, and plan to continue it in college. In fact, UMich is the perfect place for me to continue this activity because blah."

Boring! 

Instead, think about the things you've accomplished in this activity. Think of the things you've built, written, sold, or done. Think about your proudest moments in this activity. Think about everything that makes you special or different from other applicants. 

How can you incorporate this into your essay?

So, for example, say I love basketball. I can (and most people do​) write:

Every since I was in third grade, I've always loved basketball. It was the first competitive sport I ever played other than kickball, and I love the chance to be physically and mentally aggressive, since I'm a very compassionate and kind person off the court. Although rigorous academics are important to me, balance is also important, and basketball is an stress relieving activity for me. No matter how much calculus I have to study, after a game of basketball, I can go back to it feeling refreshed and ready to learn. I won't be playing on the University of Michigan Women's team, but I plan to play on the club team, as well as start co-ed and women's IM teams for my dorm, classes and other groups. 

​
Of course, this doesn't really say much about me, other than I'm "compassionate" and find sports to be "stress relieving."

Here's a much better version of the basketball essay:
​
Everything I know about life, I learned from basketball.

I learned that the most important thing… is to get in the game. The only way to improve is through experience. So figure out how to get in, and master that skill -- even if you never do it during the game. Because if you can't get into the game, nothing else matters.

The second most important thing… is to win the mental game. Anyone who knows me would say I’m among the sweetest people they’ve met. But the first thing I do when I step on the court is convince the person I’m guarding that I'm about to humiliate them. It’s all about posture, confidence, and starting explosively. The first five seconds can determine the whole game.

Third, fundamentals. They matter. Practice them every day.

Finally, if you don’t do it 100%, there’s no point doing it at all.
​

Of course, this could come off as rather aggressive, especially since I'm a woman, and people are sexist. Saying I want to make my opponents think I'm about to humiliate them might rub people the wrong way. It might not. I have to decide if I'm willing to take that risk in order to show an important part of who I am.

A slightly less aggressive version of this essay would be:
Everything I know about life, I learned from basketball.
​


I learned the most important thing… is to get in the game. The only way to improve is through experience. So figure it out. Do you need to make the most free throws? Be the fastest sprinter? Something else? Master that skill.


Otherwise, none of your other skills matter.


Second, I learned to win the mental game. No matter what my eyes tell me, I always assume I’m the biggest girl on the floor. When I play pickup, I don't notice I'm the only female player unless someone mentions it. This mindset has pervaded into other parts of my life, including physics club and debate team.


Third, start explosively. The first five seconds can determine the whole game.


Fourth, fundamentals. Practice them every day.



Finally, if you don’t do it 100%, there’s no point doing it at all.

​
This version might be a safer bet, since I show other ways of winning the mental game -- ways that are more self-focused than other-focused. It also shows that I play basketball outside of organized leagues, for fun. Which is a much better way of saying you have passion than saying, "I have passion."

Another thing you'll notice about my second two essays compared to my first one is that, even though the essay is approximately 100 words, I still broke it into several paragraphs.

No one -- NO ONE! -- likes to read 100-word paragraphs. 

Anything you can do to make the physical task of reading your essay will score you points with the poor reader, who has 100 more of these to read before lunch.

Plus, it's just better writing. 

Now let's look at the second UMich prompt:

​Everyone belongs to many different communities and/or groups defined by (among other things) shared geography, religion, ethnicity, income, cuisine, interest, race, ideology, or intellectual heritage. Choose one of the communities to which you belong, and describe that community and your place within it. (250 limit)

A lot of students get hung up on the "community" thing. They think because it's a "community," you have to write about something you've been a part of for a long time, or perhaps something you're a part of because of some circumstance or identity beyond your control.

But a community or group can mean anything.

So here's how I would approach this prompt:

1. Is there a group/community that's hugely important to you, that you haven't already written about in your other essays? 

If yes, write about that. If no:

2. Is there anything else special, amazing, or different about you that they don't know yet? What is it? Focus on that -- and then tie it in to a group or community you're a part of.

So, for example:

Things that are special about me:
  • I'm a really good conversationalist. I make friends everywhere.
  • I'm really good at seeking out opportunities -- I went to a wealthy school and got the most out of it.
  • I studied 4 years of Latin and a year of Greek -- that's basically like a minor in the Classics. 
  • I'm a really good athlete. I was captain of volleyball and basketball, but not crew.
  • I grew up on a farm -- that's pretty neat.

Here's the thing -- any of these traits could be written about in the context of community. For example:

​"Good conversationalist" essay:
​”What would you do if I went, Raaah! and shoved your arm off the armrest?”


The stranger in the middle seat looked startled. “Can’t we share it?”


“We totally can! I just wondered–would it bother you? Would it make a difference if I were a dude?”


​“I’m not sure.”


“What if I were breastfeeding? What if I held my baby, like this, and started feeding it? Would that bother you?”


“I think so…?”


“Why?”


Since starting boarding school, I’ve spent a lot of time on airplanes. And every time I fly, I learn something I can’t wait to share.


For example, I learned that people don’t always have logical justifications for their moral outrage (“I just don’t like it,” is enough for most people).


I learned that dairy farmers use RFIDs to eliminate bottlenecks in their process – and to identify, treat and quarantine sick cows before they start showing symptoms. So cool!


I learned that the best way to write an intro for my new song is to “try something simple, like humming or whistling the chorus for a few measures.”


Best. Advice. Ever.


If there’s one recurring theme in my life, it’s, “Eva, you literally make friends everywhere you go.”


That’s because I believe I can learn something from everyone. A stranger on a bus becomes a lifelong friend; the veteran at CVS tells a war story I’ll never forget.



To me, “community” doesn’t rely on spatial or temporal bounds. With an open heart, you can build micro-communities anywhere in the world.
​
​
If I were an admissions officer, an essay like this would read like a breath of fresh air. I'll've read hundreds of essays about people's families; ethnicities; sexualities; schools; and extracurriculars. Yawn.

So reading an essay about something completely different -- something that redefines the whole question -- is something I'm going to remember. 

I suppose an argument could be made that this doesn't address the prompt. That's why you should always get a second opinion. But if someone showed me an essay like this, I would say, "Bravo!"

So what about the "seeking opportunities" essay -- how does that fit into a "communities" prompt? I'll show you:
​
I’m part of a very exclusive community of teenagers who eagerly rise before 5am in pursuit of… something special.


Sometimes, it’s rowing. I didn’t even know what crew was before I arrived at Exeter -- but now, I hop out of bed before the sun at least once per week and join my team of spandex-clad athletes on the river. (Or, as Coach may groggily call it before she’s had her coffee, “swamp.”)


Yes, it’s physically painful to get up that early. But skateboarding to the boathouse down a completely empty Main Street, I can’t help but feel a sense of ownership. Like this morning belongs to me.


Other times, it’s a morning ride to the beach. Which isn’t to say that I’m a “real” biker. At 6’0, I look like a clown on my child-sized bike. I could probably make the one-hour ride in half the time with better equipment. But it’s not about PRs. My only goal is to see the Atlantic sunrise--a treasure that will never lose its novelty for this Iowa girl.


Biking alone down rural New Hampshire roads, I feel that familiar sense of ownership. Like this is my road, and my morning.


Most recently, I’ve waking up for Marine Biology field trips. Each week, I’m challenged with engaging readings and in-class demonstrations. Then, on Thursday mornings, I board the “Red Dragon” to test my knowledge in the field.


I’ve learned that the world’s oceans may hold the key to solving society’s most pressing problems--which is why, staring through foggy bus windows, I often think, This is my ocean... and I have a responsibility to understand and protect it.


Again, this is a very different take on the prompt. It's a perfectly valid one -- especially considering that they already know what activities I do. They already know what color my skin is. They already know whether I come from an affluent community or an inner city development. 

So this take on the community essay can tell them something they don't already know. It tells them about my sense of wonder. It tells them I explore opportunities -- from new sports to challenging electives to leisure activities I can enjoy on my own. 

Okay... what about the "four years of Latin and Greek" essay? How about this:
​“GUM? HOW DARE YOU!? I’LL RIP YOUR TONGUE OUT!”


A familiar voice fills the corridor as I sprint to Greek class. If I hurry, I’ll make it before Dr. Morgan locks the door, refusing entry to latecomers. (I’ve been shouting, “Hold the door!” since waaaay before it was cool.)


Welcome to the Exeter Classics Department.


Anyone who’s studied a dead language would agree that that the field attracts a certain… type. We’re all weirdos. That’s why I love it.


That, and the fact that humans reach a state of “flow” upon achieving the right combination of challenge and mastery.


Latin and Greek are the hardest classes I’ve ever taken–but my algorithmic thinking style has helped me excel, even while being berated by 80-year-old scholars in checkered bowties.


This helped me build academic confidence and cultivate a disciplined, analytical approach to problem solving.


Word order doesn’t matter; when the subject of a sentence is a quarter of the way down the page, the verb is in the first line, and there are about twelve clauses and conjunctions in between--not to mention several figures of speech (including the word “salt,” which I’m supposed to magically know means “ocean” because it’s a metonomy)--translations get tricky.


(Want to understand what it’s like to do Latin homework? Remove all the punctuation from the previous paragraph, put it in a blender, and then eloquently unscramble it.)


I won’t pursue this passion in college--but I’m certain that I’ll use the cognitive skills I’ve developed in every single class.


I think you get the idea. Your "community" essay can literally be about anything -- and your best strategy here is to really think about what makes you unique, qualified and interesting FIRST. THEN make tie it into a community.

***

Now, let's move on to the big essay. FIVE HUNDRED WORDS about why you want to go to Michigan. Specifically:

Describe the unique qualities that attract you to the specific undergraduate College or School (including preferred admission and dual degree programs) to which you are applying at the University of Michigan. How would that curriculum support your interests?

500 words is a lot -- especially considering that these kinds of essays are really hard. They require more than just personal reflection. They require actual research on your part. 

So you go and do your research... and, honestly, there's not much you can say about UM that you couldn't say about any other top university in the world: great faculty, great study abroad programs, research opportunities, student-teacher ratio. 

Dig deeper -- the whole point of this essay is to filter out applicants who were too lazy to do the research.

Because here's the thing: college is a business. Rankings matter. One factor that goes into a school's ranking is its yield -- in other words, Of all the students you admitted, how many enrolled?

If a large percentage of your admits choose to go somewhere else, your ranking falls. Meaning alumni donations fall. Your ability to attract top students, faculty and athletes falls. 

So one thing admissions officers are thinking as they read this essay is, "If we admit this student, how likely are they to actually come here?"

If you don't take time to do research, admissions officers will interpret that to mean you're applying to UM as a safety, or just because whatever. 

So do some research. Google "University of Michigan" + "thing you're interested in" to get more personalized results. (If you've tried this and you're still stuck, check out my Services and Prices page, then Contact Me. I'm happy to help find programs, clubs and opportunities at UM that could be exciting specifically for you.)
Want more help? Contact me! (But check out my rates, first.)
Here are a few UM opportunities I found that I would be excited about:
  • The College of Literature, Science and the Arts (LSA) offers a really unique Semester in Detroit (SiD) program. Many students want to study abroad someplace "glorious" like Barcelona, but this is an opportunity to visit a city in crisis, learn through hands-on experience, and have a meaningful impact. They integrate courses with the landscape of the city, and allow for internship opportunities -- which basically means you get to "test drive" different career opportunities.
  • Another cool thing about SiD is that it was totally student-initiated. Instead of saying, "Yeah! I want to go ride elephants in Thailand!" undergraduates worked hard to establish this program -- and that says something about the kind of people you'll be studying with. 
  • If you want to major or minor in Urban Studies, UM is probably one of the best places you could possibly do that. Even when you're not studying "abroad" in Detroit, you can sign up to "Day in the D," a themed, day-long, all-expenses paid trip to Detroit.
  • All of U-M's engineering majors are top-ranked. Moreover, the fact that there are 17 engineering programs shows that you will have the opportunity to gain a large breadth of engineering education.
  • U-M encourages students to pursue the arts through Student Mini-Grants, awards of up to $1,000 to support creative initiatives. Anyone is eligible for these awards -- so if you're an economics major who loves piano, or a computer scientist who loves painting, you will still have an opportunity to pursue your creative interests. 
  • Want to do research or an internship abroad? In addition to offerings through the overseas studies program, U-M has several opportunities to fund your research, internship, or service fellowship. Check out these undergraduate research funding opportunities. 
  • The University of Michigan offers a super cool class called The Creative Process. It's totally interdisciplinary, as it is a collaboration between the College of Engineering, the Penny W. Stamps School of Art & Design, the School of Music, Theater, and Dance (SMTD), and the Taubman College of Architecture and Urban Planning. Students from every major can take this class, as the focus is developing your own creative process. 
For reference, it took me about seven minutes to find out about these opportunities. Seriously -- just Google U-M + your interest, and see what you come up with. (Or contact me.)

So now you've done your research -- awesome! But you're not done yet.

See... UM admissions officers each read thousands of these essays per year. Plus, they work at UM. Chances are, they already know about every possible opportunity you could possibly write about.

That's why it's important to not just write about U-M. You need to spend a large portion of this essay writing about yourself.

Recall in Essay #1 when ​I told you to brainstorm all the things that are special about you. It's time to do that again. Ask yourself: what makes me different from other candidates? This can be world expertise about a certain topic... or it can be something about your personality. It can be a project you've worked on. It can be a poem you wrote. 

Think about what this could be for you -- and then start your essay by talking about that. 

For example, say I'm a high school senior who is interested in engineering, and maybe business. Yes, I want to talk about the qualities about UMich engineering that appeal to me -- but I should start by saying something like:
​
If business success is a presidential quality, Paris Hilton is much more qualified for the U.S. Presidency than Donald Trump.

​And if boat building is a pirate-ly quality, I am much more qualified to be a captain than Jack Sparrow.


[One or two about how I love building, and I build boats in my free time -- including an 18-foot "pirate ship," which was actually more of a barge. I would include a link to the Instagram/Flickr/whatever account where I post my boat photos]

[Paragraph about The Creative Process class, and how it would be perfect for me for x, y, z reasons.]

[Paragraph about the Michigan Sailing Club -- although I don't expect to be a fiberglass expert in the near future, I can at least still enjoy time out on the water.]

[But speaking of being a fiberglass expert, there's a club/class/machine shop at UM that offers _______, and I definitely want to check that out.] 

Another pirate-ly quality I hope to develop at UM is my business savvy. I've already begun developing this as a ______ intern at ________, and here is one of the most important lessons I learned.

[Paragraph about specific business classes I like, and/or business/career-oriented clubs, events and competitions I would do at UM.] 

[Paragraph about how the combination of classes, clubs and opportunities at UM appeals to my specific talents, and will help me further develop my most interesting skills and accomplishments.]


See what I did there? Instead of boring them with a list of things that are interesting about their school, I showed them how and why those things matter to me. I didn't just reach for the low-hanging fruit, and I made an effort to make the essay entertaining for them to read -- which, really, is the least I could do, considering they have to read thousands of these every year. 

​But, seriously. You cannot answer this question well if you don't spend at least 15-20 minutes researching the University of Michigan. This is something you can talk to your college counselor (or me!) about, since, honestly... as a high school student, you probably have no idea where to start. You don't know what a co-terminal program is. You don't know about grants and fellowships. You don't know the difference between a seminar and a section and a practicum. So it's going to be hard for you to immediately seek out the opportunities you... don't even know you want.

***

I hope you found this guide helpful. Feel free to check out my services and prices page if you're interested in setting up a one-on-one session, and check out my other blog posts about writing your USC essays, Stanford short answers, UNC Fast Facts, and University of California (UC) application.

Want more help? Check out my Rates and Services page, or Contact Me!

Submit
8 Comments
Andy Mair link
1/8/2017 12:23:48 am

Thanks a ton for this. :)

Reply
Parth Agrawal
10/3/2017 10:36:48 am

You are a life saver. Thank you very much.

Reply
Jachi
10/16/2017 07:19:22 am

You carry the light!!
Thanks alot

Reply
LIz
10/28/2017 07:24:43 am

Very helpful.

Reply
Kevin
9/10/2018 04:37:20 pm

Thanks for the great post! I was wondering if you will be writing a new Michigan post for the 2018 application season? Also, I was curious if you might be willing to write a post about how to apply to NYU and MIT, two other schools I plan to apply to. Your detailed posts are very helpful. Thanks, Kevin.

Reply
Stephanie Discher
1/17/2019 12:29:31 pm

Thank you so much. You have a true gift. I looooved your perspectives.

Reply
Mary
10/27/2019 05:53:24 pm

Thank you soooo much!!!

Reply
Male Hookups Kansas link
12/15/2022 02:24:24 pm

Thanks for sharing thhis

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Author

    Eva Glasrud completed her B.A. and M.A. at Stanford. She is now a college counselor and life coach for gifted youth.

    Archives

    October 2022
    May 2022
    July 2021
    September 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    August 2019
    April 2019
    January 2019
    October 2018
    May 2018
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    April 2017
    October 2016
    September 2016
    July 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    October 2015

    Categories

    All
    College Admissions
    Creativity
    Essay Help
    Life Coaching
    Meaning
    Purdue
    Purpose
    Stanford
    UC
    UNC
    University Of California
    University Of Southern California
    USC

    RSS Feed

Proudly powered by Weebly
Photos from fjing229, SchuminWeb (CC BY-SA 2.0), mytradingskills, alusch, Scudamore's Punting Company, verchmarco, Photographing Travis, shixart1985, ropaisus, ogungo, Michael Dunn~!, MrJamesBaker, fdecomite, Michael Dunn~!, SchuminWeb, Homedust
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
  • Oxford-Style Tutorials
  • Contact
  • Blog
  • Life Coaching
  • Payments